A little too late.

Last Christmas I only wished for two things: for him to miss me so badly, and for him to want me back with all his heart. I figured I've been a good girl all my life, so I deserve a wish come true on Christmas day. And hey, Santa did grant my wish. But he was a year too late.

Here you are telling me you miss me at the time when I have given up missing you. Of course you and I can't be together coz you clearly belong to someone else. But thanks for telling me you miss me, because you know what I felt when you said those words? Nothing. I expected butterflies..fireworks. But really, nothing came out. Not even a half smile. I can't even blurt out an "i miss you too" because that wouldn't be an honest answer. Because you know what I really miss? I miss the person that I was before I met you. The person whose happiness isn't dictated or dependent on any guy. So somehow, Santa made me realize that the things I have wished for in the past may not be the things I would still want in the future. Thanks Santa!

40 days away from you and counting.

Believe me, I want to make this work too. I don't want to sound like I'm complaining because I don't know what you're going through there..and I wish you'd tell me. Tell me how your day went. Tell me how your co-workers are treating you. Is the ocean being congenial? Are the nights getting colder? Please do tell because I have this empty gray matter wondering what you are going through..mulling why it sometimes take you quite sometime to communicate. Are the days getting busier?

I never gave you a guarantee that this'll end how we hoped it would be. All I gave you was a simple promise that I'm going to give it a try. So here I am, trying. And I pray to the good Lord that this are all worth it, because if not, I want to put an end to this already.

I miss you, Blogspot.

I know I haven't been blogging to you for the longest time. It's funny when I look at all my posts here and see how my old self was. You see, you have become a mirror reflecting the person that I was, the person I am, and the person that I'll be in the future. Nobody knows me better. And though I have 3 blogs and 1 social network account, you still have my loyalty. You know all my stories, and best of all, you know me. I have written you my dreams, my merriment, my heartaches. Someday I'll write you something significant again. Perhaps it'll be about the pains of being a pediatric nurse, or the rise and fall of a foolish writer..or maybe, it'll be about love again. Who knows? Crossing my fingers for that! I'll keep in touch. I promise.