A little while ago, my dad and I were watching a Bo Sanchez show. If you don't know who Bo Sanchez is, he's a devoted Catholic who spends his life preaching God's words and writing books about it. I was little when I first read of his works. It was a first for me to watch him on TV and I'm glad I didn't change the channel because when I heard his words, it was like God was answering what has been troubling me these past few days. I haven't been well you know. Physically, yes I am okay. But emotionally, mentally, and spiritually? No. Everyday I ask myself, what I'm doing with this life of mine? And who wouldn't? I wake up, go to work, eat, sleep..that's basically the routine everyday. Who wouldn't feel ashamed of that? I feel like I'm purposeless and that I am living a life not worth living. And so every night, it's already a struggle to pray to God because I don't have anything to say. Things are no longer the same as before. My life is empty like a stomach that hasn't been fed in weeks. I keep waiting for that one thing that'll make me change my life's perspective. And so this morning, Bo was there to answer what God has been trying to tell me this past few days. He said,
"Repeat after me.
I am God's own design.
God is not yet finish with me.
God will not give up His plan for me.
I am God's own masterpiece."
After hearing this, who am I to question God? Who am I to question this life that He has given me? He designed me in my mother's womb and knows every strand of my hair, every follicle that runs thru my skin. And if I am His masterpiece, surely He has a plan made out for me. At times I question, was I right in choosing this nursing career? Is this what God planned for me? Do I make Him proud? Maybe not. Maybe He wants something more from me. But I shouldn't worry because in time, I know everything that He has laid out for me will transpire at the right moment. The symbol of His son being crucified on the cross is His way of telling us "I will do anything for you. I will not give up on you."
Thank you Lord for reminding me that I am a worthy individual. Thank you for making me feel loved especially in times when I don't even deserve it. Thank you for making me realize that you are not yet done with me. That a lot of things are in store and I should just wait patiently and trust in your power. Thank you Father for not giving up on me.
